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How Gain Real Friends
Having said that, I understand your concern and sense your emptiness. Your question seems to confirm the fact that having real friends is important to our well being. When I speak of real friends, I am not talking about any social media digital "friends" but people you know face-to-face, that you trust, like and enjoy being with. As a "Darn Yankee" who lived in small towns most of my adult life. I'll now share my advice with you and anyone else on what it takes to acquire "real" friends. 1. Remember People's Names: Since your motive is to get someone to like you, the idea of remembering names and addressing people by their names is a secret way to open the door to a lasting friendship. People feel bigger and better when called by their names. Dale Carnegie, the author of How To Win Friends And Influence People said that the single most important words to someone is their name because it identifies them as individuals. Giving you ways to remember people's names is beyond the scope of my answer but Google that question to get suggestions. 2. Examine Your Mindset: Friendships start when you stop comparing others to yourself. Also, how you think about others will result in you repelling or becoming a magnet for those new real friends you seek. Contrary to your opinion of yourself, you have faults, they may even be the very same traits you loathe in others. 3. Smile: It was Mother Teresa who said, "I never understood all the good that a simple smile can accomplish," So when you’re trying to connect with others, remember to smile sincerely because it makes us mindful of them and steps us out of our own preoccupation of self and our egocentricities. 4. Become Genuinely Interested In Others: Training yourself to become really interested in other people will provide you with a proven way to attain real friends . Ralph Waldo Emerson, the American philosopher said, "Every man I meet is in some way my superior; and in that, I can learn from him." Simply stated that means everyone you meet can teach you things that will make you a better and more interesting person. Ask them questions to find out what those things are. 5. Learn To Listen: Euripides the Greek playwright had some excellent advice on how to find real friends. He asked this question, "Why is it that nature has given us two eyes, two ears but only one tongue?" Give up? Because he replied, "we should see and hear more than we speak." It's a fact that one of the most difficult attributes to find in another human being is one who is a good listener. Ask questions, and listen intently to their answers. You may even learn something. 6. Only Talk About Things That Interest Them: If you find yourself constantly talking about yourself and things in your life, rapidly switch the conversation over to them. Being inquisitive and listening to others is the hallmark of a real friend. Ask someone you want to be friends with this question, "How would you define a real friend?" When you ask that question, you've begun to let go of your self-centered view of the world where your main words are I, me, and mine. Instead, you'll start to appreciate his or her needs, wants, hopes and interests and gain an insight if you can meet their criteria or not. 7. Mute Your Cell Phone When Out With Others: Unless you tell people in advance you are expecting a call that must be answered, mute your phone. If you must answer, get up and find a private area in which to talk. If you want to gain real friends, you first have to be a real friend. Finally, here's a much shorter answer that I can summarize everything you need to know and do in order to attain the happiness and real friends you seek. Always follow Ê
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